Romerils v Sporting Club SPORTING CLUB could be crowned league champions if they win tomorrow, as they are highly unlikely to slip up against Springfield in their final match.

They won the reverse fixture by two runs, and this match promises to be equally close.

Openers Steve Carlyon and Matty Hague have been particularly fruitful lately, but will do well to produce another 100-plus partnership this week.

If they do, they will almost certainly win, but it will be interesting to see how the team respond if they lose a few quick wickets.

They will be hoping that they will not have to rely too heavily on Trevor Rousseau.

He has been with the club through thick and thin and last year did well in the middle order, scoring 157 runs at an average of 20.

In four visits to the crease this year, however, he has failed to score a run.

Sorry to bring this up, Trevor.

I’m only drawing attention to the fact to help motivate you, and Nick Jewell has promised to bowl me full tosses on leg stump if don’t mention him.

He may, however, be better off bowling them to Ryan Driver, though as he was out for a duck last week after top-edging one from Josh Farrow.

As if that wasn’t bad enough, as he made his way to his sympathetic team-mates he was subjected to an English lesson from colleague Martin Waite, who felt that he should correct him about his grammar.

Apparently ******* is a verb and should not therefore be followed by the noun ****.

I don’t think the chorus of ‘Who are you?’ as he walked off the field improved his mood either.

This will be the first time Romerils have seen Justin Le Fort, but a ton and two 50s from his four innings mean they will be happy to get him out cheaply.

I wonder if £50 would do it? Norah is unable to split the two sides and has predicted a draw.

Unbelievable – I can’t remember there ever being one.

If she’s right she should be fast-tracked to the top of the astrology tree and could become the biggest medium ever.

If wrong, she’ll just have to remain plain old Norah the Scorer, the most medium medium ever.

Prediction: Norah says too close to call.

Is she a medium, or something much bigger? Caesareans v Springfield BY BEATING St Ouen last week, Caesareans eventually played to their potential and have given themselves a chance to get into the top four and qualify for the Channel Islands knockout competition.

They will, therefore, be looking for maximum points from this match and hope that OVs lose their last two games.

Jules Nolli will see this as a chance to get as many points as he can to overtake Dave Morfee in the Jersey Side by Side Handicap.

He is certainly in good form at the moment, notching up 15 wickets in his last four games and also scoring a few runs.

Springfield are at risk of ending another season winless, and this match represents their last real chance of a victory because they play Sporting Club next week.

They have not really looked like winning since the second week and have been on the end of a couple of batterings.

Last Saturday was no exception and Bjorge Lillelien’s quote (after Sweden had beaten England in 1981) aptly describes the mauling: ‘Harry Rowe, Ned Flanders, Phil Evans, Homer Simpson, Barry Stein, Mayor Quimby, Richard Tribe, Principle Skinner, Peter Canham, your boys took one hell of a beating.’ They will be without Suthan, probably still nursing the bruise on his chest after he had caught Ryan Driver out last week, and Alan Lesbirel is an absentee again.

They still have some reason for optimism, the likes of Kev Crowell, Richard Parker, Pete Canham and Mick Johnson can all score runs.

But taking wickets has been problematic recently.

The more I look for a reason why Springfield could win this, the more reasons I find why they won’t.

I am therefore predicting a Caesareans victory, which effectively condemns Springfield to another winless season .

.

.

Sorry.

Prediction: Springfield may be Suthanless, Lesbirelless and winless, but they still have their pride…..Mother’s Pride, that is.

Old Victorians v St Ouen ALTHOUGH Old Victorians failed by 16 runs to match Sporting Club’s 290, it was still a cracking effort.

It was surprising that after both openers had cored hundreds the previous week, they altered their batting line-up, Chris Jones dropping down to four to allow Fraser Mcinnes to open.

Don’t think he will be doing that again, as Jonsie was out for a duck.

Ollie Hughes’s name at number 8 also raised a few eyebrows, and what about Andy Brown? Browny is to OVs what Trevor Rousseau is to SCF and does whatever he’s asked without question, and he has been instrumental in more than one of the one of the club’s victories this season.

As soon as the playboys return though, he’s discarded, and from his opening position has floated all the way down to number 9.

While their batting is strong, their bowling could be subject to some abuse.

The fact that Ward Jenner with 12 wickets – four more than second-best, part-time bowler Bobby Minty – is their top wicket-taker implies it is not their strong point.

This is St Ouen’s final match of the season and they look nailed on for a place in the top four; anything else would be a travesty after all this season’s good work.

They have been a mirror-image of the talented under-achievers they were last year (well, not a complete mirror-image, as that would make them talentless over-achievers) and this promises to be a good match.

The St Ouen attack, which has generally performed well even though Paul Horton has been out a fair bit of the time, will be tested by the impressive OVs’ batting line-up.

Horty returned to his best last week with three wickets and he Morfee, Alex Morgan and Richard Gonnerscoresweetfall have been responsible for 41 of the 62 wickets the team has taken this season.

Despite their loss last week, the omens look good for OVs and I think they can win this match.

St Ouen should acquire the necessary points to qualify for the knockout tournament, though, and I’m sure they will be cheering each point as they earn them.

Gosh, all that without mentioning Johnny Gough.

Can you please do something for me to write about next week other than letting your brother outscore you by 82 runs, take one more catch and two more wickets than you? Prediction: OVs to restore natural order, but Browny’s eyes may still be blue.