THE streets of St Helier were at fever pitch this week in the build-up to the highlight of the year – the switching on of the Christmas lights.

As a wave of excited anticipation washed over shoppers, the Island’s jungle drums beat out the speculation on which celebrities would perform the honour.
As organisers kept the identity of the mystery stars close to their chests to avoid mass hysteria breaking out on the night, various names were popping out of the hat.

If these celebrities were so famous that the public had to be kept in the dark in the interests of ‘elf ‘n’ safety we could justifiably assume that they were A list Hollywood or Simon Cowell’s hottest protégés at the very least. Could it be the most famous family in the world, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie and their rainbow offspring hopping over to Jersey from their French château for some duty free shopping? Or what about those tone deaf twins recently booted off The X Factor, Jedward?

Either the organisers of the Island’s Christmas festivities don’t get out much or the media black-out surrounding the great switch-on was yet another example of ‘elf ‘n’ safety gone made. When the moment came there was no mass hysteria such as experienced in Birmingham early last month when pop stars JLS turned on the city’s lights and 60 people were injured when they were caught in a surge of fans eager for a glimpse of their idols.

For the young families who formed the majority of thousand or so souls who thronged into the square it was more a case of ‘who?’ rather than ‘wow!’ No offence to actors Jessie Wallace and Brian Capron, but they hardly fit the bill of ‘stars’ whose presence among the masses ignites hysteria of any kind. If you bumped into them in a supermarket and were bold enough, you might ask for an autograph and enquire what it was like to work with ‘soap’ legends Barbara Windsor (Peggy Mitchell) and Bill Roache (Ken Barlow), but risk your life to be in their presence? I don’t think so.

The only ‘celebrity’ who got mobbed last Thursday was a very large puffin that spent more than an hour posing for family snaps with children of all ages – adults included – who crowded around the over-sized bird convinced it was Channel Television’s Oscar. The former soap ‘stars’ were well out of reach, perched on the balcony of the United Club for the briefest of appearances – well, I suppose their bodyguards had to avoid crazed fans scaling the building to reach them.

In the frenzy surrounding the performing of this seasonal duty did anyone inquire whether they were paid and if so what was the size of their fee let alone consider the effect all those twinkling lights would have on the Island’s carbon footprint?

This over-reaction by the powers that be fortunately did not detract from the first event of the Fête dé Noué – the Island’s Christmas festival that hardly anyone can pronounce correctly and which – with the exception of this esteemed newspaper – Jersey’s media lamentably fails to reproduce with the all important accents on the appropriate letters! This sloppiness is becoming endemic and cannot justified by the lame excuse that ‘I can’t find the character palette.’ Well, even computers with equally annoying American spell checks can reproduce accents for all languages.

The Royal Square did not need pretty lights to get us all in the mood for Christmas – even if it was still four weeks away. The wide-eyed and broadly grinning faces of the little children – all far more sensibly wrapped up against the winter chills than the scantily-clad Miss Wallace – was all that was needed to bring cheer to a November night.

Children have the knack of occasionally saying something remarkable that shows wisdom far beyond their age. This uncanny insightfulness can be far more illuminating than any artificial light – Christmas or otherwise. Last Thursday they queued to hug a giant ‘fake’ puffin because each little child – in engaging innocence – wanted to believe that it was real. Just as when they sit on Santa’s knee in grottos all over the Island over the coming weeks each will believe that this is the man who will deliver their presents on Christmas Eve.

Childhood ends the day you learn the earth-shattering truth that Santa Claus is not real. In a way it prepares us all for the harsh realities of life that adults lie and you can’t believe everything you will be told throughout life.

The panelled debating chamber of the Laughter Factory echoed to the common sense of children last week when it was taken over by Year 5 pupils from St Martin’s School. They occupied the seats of our beloved politicians to debate a subject that the Council of Ministers and the current shift have been ignoring for far too long – the future of the former Plémont Holiday Camp.

Unlike the site owners who want to see the maximum return on their investment, the eight and nine year olds were not interested in profit and loss sheets or the development value of Island land.

Having heard both sides of the argument, the 21 children voted overwhelmingly that there should be no new buildings on the headland that they equally firmly believe should be returned to its natural state. Their name scan be added to the 10,300 people who signed a petition to save the Plémont headland from development and return it to its natural state. And let’s not forget the States Members who in October 2006 overwhelmingly backed a proposition to preserve the site.

As those children will soon learn it takes a long time to get things done in an Island which lacks bold and incisive politicians. Discussing the debate with one of the few States Members whose judgement I respect, he commented that the children did not understand the financial implications of their support for public money being spent on saving Plémont.

Of course they don’t, but at their tender age they do appreciate the difference between right and wrong as well as still being innocent enough for society’s stark realities not to have shattered their illusions.

The headline to last week’s JEP report on the mock debate was St Martin’s pupils take over States. If only.