The unabated advance of violence in St Helier

Tuesday 2nd March 2010, 3:00PM GMT.

From John Heys.
I SEE that there is a new free dental service in St Helier, to the relief of many, no doubt.

To take advantage of this rather special service, all you need to do is to go into St Helier by day, though night will get better results, and wait a short while until the experts arrive and you stand a good chance of being selected.

You will have a few of your teeth removed, generally the front ones, and at the same time you could have that troublesome mobile phone taken away to be serviced, though so far the return time is terrible.

Do not be disappointed if you have to hang around a bit to be dealt with, as it is only an experienced minority, we are repeatedly informed, who are prepared to operate.
Oh, and if you do happen to lie down on the pavement, you can have your head reshaped by a number of bovver boots, also at no extra charge.

This service will not be interrupted, as there is no one on patrol to observe or prevent it, though be assured you could be famous by getting your treatment recorded on CCTV so that if your face can be reshaped, someone may recognise you and think they saw you on TV.

And so it goes on, pathetically unabated.

1
PJG

March 2, 2010 at 3:29 pm

On Saturday night Sunday morning I visited one nightclub berore going to a resturant for dinner and 2 afterwards, leaving the last at 02.30.
I saw beat coppers outside La Cala and the Havana.
I also saw at least 3 circulating patrol cars.
I saw no violence inside or outside the clubs I visited, only very happy people.
What expirience does John Heys base his (comical)”story” on,
Media hype ?

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2
REG

March 2, 2010 at 4:31 pm

I agree, i’m thinking of moving to L’pool, London or another major European city were I can walk the streets late at night and not be afraid of the gang walking towards me…….

Get a grip!!

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3
Pip Clement

March 2, 2010 at 5:54 pm

I have lived in a few medium sized towns in England and I would say that the violence is no better and no worse than there and it is thankfully rare.
You do see some very drunk people in St Helier on a weekend night but they are mainly peaceful.
Occasionally a stranger is assaulted but fights between people who already know each other or domestic incidents are far more common.
Like everywhere you can go looking for trouble and you might find it but St Helier does not possess a ‘wrong side of town’!

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4
big bean

March 2, 2010 at 5:55 pm

Maybe he’s basing his letter on events similar to one that happened to a mate of mine the other night, who, whilst out celebrating the birth of his new baby the other week, was punched to the ground by a gang of youths and had his nose broken.

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5
SCOUSER

March 2, 2010 at 8:11 pm

I have lived on the island for over 40yrs,i travel all over the world,i have not found anywhere in Europe,Asia,Far East,as safe as jersey.I spend a fair amount of time in the UK and there are places that are very unsafe to walk around late at night.I have never,had a problem walking around town late at night.

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6
Michael

March 3, 2010 at 8:52 am

Ridculous scaremongering.

I have been going out on a Friday and Saturday for ten years (not every weekend, I add, but over ten years that is quite a few nights out).

I have NEVER, I repeat NEVER, been in a fight or been attacked whilst out – and I have to admit I have been very drunk on some occasions. Perhaps walking through St Helier with the type of attitude towards people that Mr Heys so obviously exudes encourages people to be more inclined to violence in his direction

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7
joker

March 4, 2010 at 1:46 pm

Michael #6

I couldn’t have put it better myself. Mr Heys should write for the Daily Mail.

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